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[One romantic young poet is hard at work, as can be evidenced by the sound of his writing scratching away on paper. He quietly speaks to himself as he works.]

A feeling as if-- in flight? Soaring, free? Of bursting, of-- of... joy beyond measure. But no, no word is adequate. No phrase not overused, not worn out and thinned until its meaning has been lost.

[There's more scratching now, the inelegant editing process of a writer whose process demands the physical obliteration of any turns of phrase he finds inadequate. Now he addresses the Network.]

Foolish, isn't it? That we so frequently attempt to quantify, explain, or represent the feeling of love... No phrase has yet proven adequate, no painting impassioned enough, no song quite potent enough, to capture the feeling. A pure, raw feeling which grips you at your core, against which you are powerless. That which can move us to words we did not know we could speak, actions we did not know we were capable of, depths of emotion we did not know we could experience...

There are no words for love; there is only the experience, and it cannot be replicated nor simulated. Love is...

It is love, and though it has been tossed about, used and misused, applied without discretion to that which pales in comparison to its truest form, weakened and watered down through such linguistic carelessness, there is no other word. Nor will there ever be.

[With a sigh, he turns off the device.]
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[voice]

Um-- in case anyone we know is concerned, I just wanted to let you all know that Neil and I are staying at the warehouse, with Rosella. It's... well, a lot safer than our apartment is, and-- I don't know, it's sort of comforting to have more people around with all of this going on.

It seems like it's a good thing we managed to come yesterday, too... it sounds like things are getting worse out there. I, uh-- I don't know if there's really much that I can do, but... if anyone has any ideas on how to fix this and needs people to help, I'll do whatever I can. I mean, if there's anything I can do. I'm not anything special... I don't have any powers, I'm not strong or even exceptionally smart, but... the City is my home. I don't want to see it destroyed. I don't even want to leave. Right now I'm just trying to stay safe and stay out of the way, but if there's something more I can do... I will.

We helped patch the barrier once before-- that was with the deities, and... well, they've been pretty quiet during all this, but... still. There has to be something that we can do.

[later that evening... action @ the warehouse]

[One of the best ways Todd has to unwind is to write. That shouldn't be surprising to anyone who knows him, of course. It's not that it's a form of escapism, though; it's more a way to move beyond dwelling on his current situation and move his mind into a different type of reasoning, one that's more abstract and subjective. It lets him approach one thing from a multitude of perspectives and connect things in ways he wouldn't have thought of otherwise. It's an exercise which makes working through all the conflicting, disorganized streams of thought in his mind seem a bit less impossible.

Of course, this is a bit larger than most of the situations he's approached this way. Right now, all he seems to get is doom and gloom, circular verses that don't work through anything but rather plant themselves firmly in a rut. If anything, it's making it worse.

Still, he doesn't what else to do with himself right now. So he sits on the bed in the room he and Neil have been put up in, in the warehouse, and he writes, and all of his frustrations and fears tumble out onto the paper in a frantic, scrawled jumble of words.]


[ooc: Backtag warning! I'm crashing soon and prob. won't be back until after work tomorrow (though I may sneak a few tags if it's a lighter day >>;). But, I will be backtagging on both this and Wilson's entry from yesterday. <3]
mumbled_truth: (From the moment we enter crying)
I... I really only had one resolution, and it's not new, exactly, but... something I've been-- well, trying to work on.

Um. I always mean to talk more. To talk to more people I don't know, and to talk to people I already know more. It's... [a small, nervous laugh] ...a lot easier to say that than it is to do it, but... it's worth trying, I think.

And that... well, it's actually just part of it. I generally need to be more confident. I need to... to worry less about what other people think; what they think about what I say, or do, or what I write.

Writing, especially. I should second-guess myself less... revising, rewriting, that's okay, but giving up on something I'm writing? I need to do that less. I have been doing it less than I used to, but... I do still have a way to go. I throw out too many things.

[He hesitates, for a moment, gathering his thoughts.]

I just need to believe that I can be good at things. I never used to, not really, at least never good enough for it to be worth anything, but... now, sometimes I do. Sometimes, now, I don't even just think that I can be good at things, I think I am good at them.

... sometimes, anyway, which... is better than never.

[There's a slight pause.]

Neil? I have something, that you can read.
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Um... Is today's curse just to compliment people? Because I had some really... strange conversations when I was out.

Anyway. Um. I was actually wondering if there are... um... any writers in the City? I sort of-- I mean, anyone who's experienced, maybe, that might not mind teaching someone? Um... poetry, specifically.

And... that's all. Um. Thank you.


[ooc: Tags spotty, healing heroics on WoW tonight XD /even more of a dork than you thought]
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So... most people here have roommates, right?

...I was just wondering if anyone had any suggestions about how you might be able to keep a particularly annoying one out of your things?

I mean, admittedly, I'm used to this from home anyway, but... I didn't have as much that I didn't want some nosy actor going through there. And back home, he never actually did anything like...

Well, here, there should be a picture if I got this thing to work right...


ooc cut for image )

...okay, see? It's just... well... I just prefer not to find things like this in my notebook when I open it. That's all.

Maybe I just need a book with a lock on it...



[ooc: With special thanks to Alms for actually drawing that in the notebook I write Todd's IC poems in. XD]
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[Petulant poet is petulant.]

Um-- I'm guessing this is somehow the same curse that's making everyone post poetry, but... well. I-- I sort of have words in my head -- entire phrases formed -- and when I write them, or even try to say them, they just... well, they don't come out? They're all... different.

And awful.

...even I'm not usually this bad.
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Hand Written / Off-Network / In Garbage )

It was a little odd having people know so much about me, but... that wasn't such a bad curse. Aside from how crowded it was, of course.

And... I hope some of you got a chance to see people you wanted to, even if it was just a day.

[Filtered to Deities / Unhackable]

Excuse me? I'm... I'm sorry to bother you again, I just... I've been thinking about the deal, for Neil's life? I think... I might want to do it.

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Todd Anderson

January 2012

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